September 24, 2012

• How To Be Handicapped: A Primer

  I should preface this by saying I am not on any form of Government Assistance.

   

  That said, I should explain that it’s been over a decade since I had regular, full time work, that included any kind of benefits. I did apply for SSI about five years back, when I was less handicapped than I am now. I had spinal damage from two car accidents, but was rejected.

  Note: EVERYONE gets rejected the first time,.

  Since I have developed nerve damage, and something called compartment syndrome in my feet, making it difficult to walk most days. I am THRILLED when I can spend two hours on my feet…but usually that’s too much. It takes me a few days after that to recover enough to do more than make it to the bathroom. If you never had bone and nerve pain in your feet, you might think I was being a baby about it. It feels like someone is crushing the bones when you try to walk. I imagine if you drove a nail into your foot, you could duplicate the pain level.

  So it’s not that i am too proud for a minimum wage job…it’s more like most of them will not hire me. They have rules about employees sitting, you see. The other day, I was out with my daughter for two hours. The pain started, so I knew it was time to stop. But when we got home, it turns out that my friend’s horse had gotten loose…and was standing the middle of the road. I’ve fed him treats, so thank goodness, he came when I called…but it took more than a half hour for someone who KNEW how to handle horses to get there. The only way to keep him from the road was to block him…stand in front of him. My feet really hurt by the time they got there…but what choice did I have? If I had ignored it, for sure that horse would be dead…not to mention the poor bastard who hit him. But it didn’t make me more able. It took two days to recover from it…not to mention prednisone and pain killers.

   

  So when I say I can’t spend three hours on my feet, it’s not a guess.

  I’ve been applying for regular jobs—but quite frankly they DON’T hire people over 40. My brain works. I have awesome writing skills, can edit and proof read…BUT…I will be 52 in less than a week. Sure…there are laws against discrimination…but proving it is a cheap thrill.  The government even offers credits to companies that hire the handicapped…but most ignore it. So…that leaves me where?

  I can apply for government assistance…something I am loathe to do…but chances are good it will take YEARS to be approved. In the mean time, I need to pay for rent, food, gas…all those good things. I am in worse shape physically then I was five years ago.

  But I’m not dead. I’m also not one of Romney’s 47 percent. (See the first sentence.)

  So for those who hate and resent the “dependent”, I really need to ask you a question. What would you have us do? Do you favor the idea of putting us out on ice floes…so you won’t have to look at us? How ashamed do I have to feel, if I do ask for food stamps? Am i now infirm enough…or must I really be messing the bed to impress you? You say you don’t favor government “interference”, but since companies seem to have no problem abusing their workers without someone overseeing the process…what the HELL do you suggest?

  The whole “no sitting” policy is supposed to encourage workers to keep busy. But when you have someone like me who can’t stand? Is your answer that I am not qualified for the job? And if so, what about the companies who won’t hire people past a certain age? Simple answers usually come from simple minds. Complex questions rarely require a “just let the air out of the tires” solution. Oh…and you DO have a say. But ignoring the situation is not an option. If you think people like me are not “your problem”, you are basically saying we need to die…survival of the fittest, and all that. And you are entitled to your opinion, of course. But just be mindful that the same standard may be held to you…or someone you love. Someone else can decide that they are not “worthy”…and should be extinguished.

   

  As for me…I’d rather have a job, thanks. I would love to support myself, and not have to ask for a nickel from anyone. But walking…you’d be surprised how handy a skill that is. Today was a good day. I made it down the stairs and did my laundry. I am trying to be careful…just in case one of those resumes I sent out gives me a call. I am hoping they don’t hold my gray hair, or my limp against me. I am praying that my cane is not a huge turn off.  That is how you are handicapped…not by the limits of your own body, but by the bias of the people calling the shots.

   

  Welcome to my world…

  • 2:32 pm
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